Alas had a great post today about her Real Life Friends’ List. It kind of struck a cord in me. I sat back and thought, if I was going to catch up with an old friend, who would it even be? I don’t have many old close friendships. I’ve lived in four wildly different places in the last ten years. I’ve made friends in each, and stay in contact (hurrah for Facebook!) but there’s not a whole lot of continuity.
I’ve moved servers a few times in the last four years, too. It’s even harder to stay in touch with friends you left behind on an old server. Real ID can help but the last time we changed servers that wasn’t even there. But Crits and Giggles is the first guild that I’ve made really close friends, so it’s a moot point anyway.
It occurs to me that those two things are linked. When we moved down here to Florida, I was pregnant and I had a contract to telecommute to my old job. It meant I didn’t go out and find a job when we came down here. We found a church – two churches – and a little D&D group and that was it. For the first two years I lived here, I knew all of two people who weren’t from the church. And then it went to one. This area…. I like it, but between the snowbirds and the military, nobody moves here and expects to stay long. You just don’t build relationships.
And then Nomster came along and I got even more stay at home -ish than I had been. I liked staying home. Some weeks I go to Walmart once and Publix once and that’s it.
WoW has been my social outlet. I know that in the evening I can log on and have a guild full of people to chat with, if I feel like it. We’ve got an influx of new guildies in the last few months and I don’t know everyone who might be online, but that doesn’t matter. I might like them! There’s old guild members that I didn’t get to know when we joined that I might just start hanging with, running instances or raids, and find that I like them.
One of my brothers raids with us. He lives a thousand miles away, but we see him every weekend, and usually during the week. Is there any wonder I feel closer to him than my other siblings? I actually have some clue of what’s going on in his life.
I have friends I can chat with. I’ve got emails for some of them so if I get really bored and Reversion’s not enough, I can reach out and talk to people. I can do that for old RL friends too, but…. the guild gives us something in common that just doesn’t exist any more with my friends from Grad School, or my fanfiction days.
One of my guild friends turns out to live in the same town as we do. Now she’s in our D&D group. The lines between WoW and RL blur again…
So when anyone drops little hints that spending all our time playing WoW sounds like a waste, I laugh at them. I’m being way more social in the evening than someone who just sits and watches TV!
So if you want to talk to me, come to Azeroth. I’ll be hanging out with my friends.
I completely understand this. I moved away from home 9 years ago and ended up in a large city with no friends. The first real friend I made introduced me to WoW and I haven’t felt lonely since. Some of my best times have come from playing WoW and the friendships I have made in game. I’ve even met my boyfriend in WoW. I am closer with my WoW friends than I am with people I’ve been friends with since I was 6.
I <3 my WoW peeps
A little harder to hang out when your friend is off playing Horde on some other server though, huh … >.>
At least with Stalker ID we can still chat while I’m over there indulging my belf fantasies. ^.^
>< yeah it can be frustrating.
At least you show up for raids!
I show up for raids too, after indulging my belf fantasies….even though I’m a troll.
^ HAWT
and you call me a perv
I have RL friends I see daily (we work together) but WoW friends are just different (in a good way!!!). I love getting random emails at work about the game or life or whatever! WoW and the people in it are awesome! This reminds me- why haven’t I stalker ID’d you yet : )
Hee hee, feel free to stalker id me – I’m playing hooky from wow tonight but I’ll be back tomorrow!
I have a similar situation where I moved back home to a small town where I grew up a few years ago, I’d been gone for about 10-12 years at that point and anyone I might have known before leaving was long gone/lost contact with.
The people I knew where I used to live are far away, and so I’m stuck in a town with no friends. WoW is a great social outlet when you have nothing else, I’ve made some great friends through it, and I also have a brother who plays.
I find it’s difficult to find friends as an adult. At work I’m the in-between person so no one to hang out with after work. We get along fine during work, but most of them are 40-55 with kids/teenagers or there are a couple of guys who are 20-22. Me, I’m single and 30, so I don’t really hang out with either crowd once work finishes *lol*
So, for me – I’m happy with WoW. I socialise with my brother there, I have an old friend from where I used to live that I raid with on an alt on weekends – and of course I have my own guild and some really good friends there as well. People who don’t think WoW is social, don’t know what they’re talking about. I agree about the comment regarding being more social on WoW than when watching TV. My mom always complains that I spend time on WoW (she doesn’t get it), but she’ll easily waste several hours every evening watching TV, then she calls *me* unsocial! It’s a good thing she doesn’t see exactly how much time I spend on WoW. I could never ever live with her hehe
My mom lives far away, and has had to learn to tolerate video games. Plus I keep telling her how social it is and how we hang with my brother. And heck he’s in college so at least we’re keeping him from wild drunken parties every weekend right? My in laws I think are a little less tolerant but they live far away too. I figure if Rev and I are happy, and Nomster gets attention, nobody else gets a say.
Are you kidding, the raids are wild parties. I was pounding the Thunderbrew Lagers last weekend, whew!
But seriously, some people really don’t get that it is a social thing. They say that video games are antisocial, but I hang out with friends and family most night, we just happen to be in different places.
I very much relate to this. About a year ago I moved across the continent and to a different country in order to be with my husband while he finishes grad school. The only people I really know here are my husband’s fellow grad students, and while I like them I’ve only become good friends with one of them – and it just so happens that she’s the one who also plays WoW. (Go figure, right? LOL) This means that most of my social life happens online. I mean, half the time I’m not even “gaming”, I’m just chatting with my friends via a shiny, graphical, instant message system.
The way the world is so interconnected these days is a big reassurance for those of us who have to live away from our friends and family. Facebook is a lifesaver, but it’s not the social experience I get in WoW.
I just wish it were easier to play on the same server with people.